Creepiest job advert ever

Thanks to anonymous radfem friend for the tip-off to the Creepiest Job Advert Ever.

Librarian £25,000-£35,000 SURREY
Location: Surrey

Description: Librarian
£25,000-30,000 per annum
(Dependent on experience and background the salary is negotiable)

Our client is a well known Dr, (International zoo and wildlife specialist) with extensive interests in literature, conservation, medicine, property dealing, silk & jewellery. The organisation is based in Surrey.
We are looking for a special and probably quite unique individual to work closely with our client; someone who is completely efficient and self motivated, computer literate and has some experience of travel, especially the tropics (ideally).
The library is central to the Foundation and the role of Librarian is a particularly important job

You will need:

  • To be both a competent librarian and slip into the tropical style like a natural
  • To be responsible for the care and protection of books already in my possession, and for the purchase of all new books to be added to the library
  • To maintain catalogues of the current books
  • To monitor and attend auction houses for forthcoming book auctions and inform of any relevant items for the library
  • To monitor websites and book dealers for relevant items
  • To maintain subscriptions and links to relevant scientific journals for the library and be able to download scientific articles as required
  • To develop a knowledge of techniques for the preservation of books to help plan a library for the future
  • To keep accounts of all expenses for the library
  • To be available for trips overseas to visit the Foundation’s projects
  • General administration and ad.hoc duties as and when required

Very Important Information:
In order to work effectively with our client it is imperative that you match the following criteria (Please do not apply if these statements do not reflect your own personal interests)

  • Have a genuine love of books, be widely read and preferably have a particular interest in books about natural history and exploration, particularly of Africa
  • You must have a passion for wildlife
  • Have a interest in overseas travel and the tropics
  • Love nature, jewellery and the finer things in life such as natural materials for clothing (silks, cottons etc)
  • Be adventurous, free spirited and untamed by civilization

Benefits:

  • The ‘offices’ you’ll be working in will have a tropical ambiance, be at high temperatures, designed with tropical plants and free flowing water features (you’re encouraged to wear sandals or walk barefoot; and really feel at home and relaxed whilst working)
  • Complimentary jewellery, designer clothes, books and perfume will be given for use in work time, both in the UK and overseas
  • Monthly pedicures and manicures to keep you feeling pampered and appreciated
  • Flexible working hours
  • All expenses paid overseas trips
  • Mobile, laptop, car and accommodation provided when needed
  • All expenses paid overseas trips

Basically specifying everything except for how often you are expected to bonk the old pervert. Given that the pay offered is in the mid to top range, probably quite often I would expect.

Yeah, he’s a foot fetishist, but also likes to dress up his conquests librarians in silks and designer clothes (but note, he isn’t giving you any of this stuff, you probably have to wear the same clothing his last conquest librarian wore, *nice* secondcies!).

And don’t let the switching between ‘third person’ (a Dr.) to ‘The Organisation/The Foundation’ to ‘my’, do you sweet little head in any!

To all interested applicants, I would enquire as to what exactly the “ad hoc duties” entailed. This is some seriously non-vanilla shit.

BUT WAIT!
We have an interested applicant!

Fetishists, you just gotta love how specific they are.

11 thoughts on “Creepiest job advert ever

  1. That certainly is creepy. I remember when I lived in Russia that job adverts would specify sex, with a disclaimer at the bottom, specifying one of the requirements:

    “No hangups”

  2. Yet another male prostitutor seeking to purchase a female in order to subject her to his mandatory sexual demands. Reminds me of that well known website created by yet another male entrepreneur wherein he arranges for wealthy older men to ‘purchase’ young women in order to use them as temporary sex slaves. Oh but I forget these transactions are called ‘sugar daddies’ because the young women are the ones supposedly benefitting by hooking up with wealthy older men and these wealthy men are the ones paying for these women’s accommodation; clothing etc. But guess which sex are the ones who decide when and if the transaction will be terminated and no it isn’t the women – but men as usual.

    The correct terminology is males purchasing women to use as their personal female sex slaves. Who said male ownership over females has been eliminated because it hasn’t – instead euphemisms are used in order to hide men’s continuing belief in their innate right to purchase any female for their sexual exploitation. Male who created this advertisement is a John and he is engaged in Johnstitution or rather he is a Prostitutor.

  3. Well no I draw the line at foot jewellery, and there’s gunna be some negotiation on that salary. It looks the he’s paying under reasonable librarian wages, and nothing for me walking around without my orthotics and orthopedic shoes! I’m mean, I’m going to need a LOT of pedicures.

    But savage. I can deliver. Officially sanctioned by his countrymen, circa 1700.

  4. Would I get to choose my own pinky-toe ring? Also, what are the guidelines in re: perfume? Because I don’t like tropical florals; they always make me smell like rotting coconut, and this perv seems to be going for a tropical floral zeitgeist-y thing.

    Gross. And you know, something like this actually happened to me once. Went on a job interview for a “personal assistant” when I was 23 or so. The interview consisted of me trying to figure out what the job actually entailed, as the interviewer made vague allusions to “needing someone to help run (his) life.” When I got up to leave, he enfolded me in an incredibly unwanted hug.

    :shudder:

    • Me too. What are the ODDS!!

      All kinds of talk about after hours, and other very suggestive hints. Me 18. Nothing about the job. I went back to the employment agency lady, who turned purple, jumped up throwing his file on the desk, spitting how they had provided him with three ‘girls’ and they all left very soon and NOW SHE KNEW WHY!! Well, he can just get his own girls from now on.

      She sent me to someone whom she assured me was respectable and would train me. Oh. He. Sure. Did.

      Again, can you believe it? What are the. .

  5. I’m surprised he didn’t say “feet size small, 5 or under.” Foot fetishists looooove baby and child feet. Or, in order to appear somewhat respectable, adult women with child sized bodies. And feet. Maybe he’s saving that for the coup de grace?

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