Thanks to anonymous radfem friend for the tip-off to the Creepiest Job Advert Ever.
Librarian £25,000-£35,000 SURREY
£25,000-30,000 per annum
(Dependent on experience and background the salary is negotiable)
Our client is a well known Dr, (International zoo and wildlife specialist) with extensive interests in literature, conservation, medicine, property dealing, silk & jewellery. The organisation is based in Surrey.
We are looking for a special and probably quite unique individual to work closely with our client; someone who is completely efficient and self motivated, computer literate and has some experience of travel, especially the tropics (ideally).
The library is central to the Foundation and the role of Librarian is a particularly important job
You will need:
- To be both a competent librarian and slip into the tropical style like a natural
- To be responsible for the care and protection of books already in my possession, and for the purchase of all new books to be added to the library
- To maintain catalogues of the current books
- To monitor and attend auction houses for forthcoming book auctions and inform of any relevant items for the library
- To monitor websites and book dealers for relevant items
- To maintain subscriptions and links to relevant scientific journals for the library and be able to download scientific articles as required
- To develop a knowledge of techniques for the preservation of books to help plan a library for the future
- To keep accounts of all expenses for the library
- To be available for trips overseas to visit the Foundation’s projects
- General administration and ad.hoc duties as and when required
Very Important Information:
In order to work effectively with our client it is imperative that you match the following criteria (Please do not apply if these statements do not reflect your own personal interests)
- Have a genuine love of books, be widely read and preferably have a particular interest in books about natural history and exploration, particularly of Africa
- You must have a passion for wildlife
- Have a interest in overseas travel and the tropics
- Love nature, jewellery and the finer things in life such as natural materials for clothing (silks, cottons etc)
- Be adventurous, free spirited and untamed by civilization
- The ‘offices’ you’ll be working in will have a tropical ambiance, be at high temperatures, designed with tropical plants and free flowing water features (you’re encouraged to wear sandals or walk barefoot; and really feel at home and relaxed whilst working)
- Complimentary jewellery, designer clothes, books and perfume will be given for use in work time, both in the UK and overseas
- Monthly pedicures and manicures to keep you feeling pampered and appreciated
- Flexible working hours
- All expenses paid overseas trips
- Mobile, laptop, car and accommodation provided when needed
- All expenses paid overseas trips
Basically specifying everything except for how often you are expected to bonk the old pervert. Given that the pay offered is in the mid to top range, probably quite often I would expect.
Yeah, he’s a foot fetishist, but also likes to dress up his
conquests librarians in silks and designer clothes (but note, he isn’t giving you any of this stuff, you probably have to wear the same clothing his last conquest librarian wore, *nice* secondcies!).
And don’t let the switching between ‘third person’ (a Dr.) to ‘The Organisation/The Foundation’ to ‘my’, do you sweet little head in any!
To all interested applicants, I would enquire as to what exactly the “ad hoc duties” entailed. This is some seriously non-vanilla shit.
We have an interested applicant!
Fetishists, you just gotta love how specific they are.